Redskins QB Kirk Cousins Proclaims the Hot Dog a Sandwich – “They gotta be, right? It’s between two pieces of bread.”

Kirk Cousins returned to Reddit for an AMA (Ask Me Anything)—and his answers were full of life-changing revelations about boy bands, breakfast foods, and the taxonomical status of hot dogs.

Source: Redskins QB Kirk Cousins Proclaims the Hot Dog a Sandwich – “They gotta be, right? It’s between two pieces of bread.”

This gorilla understands climate change better than the Republican party

Depending on who is asked, the results of the recent 2015 U.N. Climate Change Conference either filled spectators with the joy of Environmental God  Bill Mckibben drop kicking a mascot dressed up to look like the Keystone XL Pipeline, or with the apathy of well, nearly any other climate summit.

But, there were two vital things (indirectly) learned from the 2015 Conference of the Parties (Cop 21):

First, apes–specifically gorillas in this case– have enough understanding of human society that they can communicate pretty damn well with sign language. But secondly, and more importantly, gorillas have enough human communication down to side with climate scientists in calling humanity stupid (the gorilla’s words, not mine) for trashing the planet into oblivion. Which means…Literal monkeys could do a better job at climate legislation than the GOP party.

Thanks to the conservation organization Noé, Koko the gorilla was able to send her own message to the nations attending the climate summit earlier last month. In her message, Koko urges humanity to “Fix Earth, Help Earth” and to hurry. Koko tells her viewers that she loves Earth and loves humans, but nevertheless, humans are stupid with natural resource management (but with outstanding character, Koko apologizes for the name calling). At the end of her message, she thanks the leaders for working to protect the nature Koko represents.

According to the Gorilla Foundation, the “video was made with footage of Koko reacting after she has been informed about what is at stake at COP21”. After Koko was informed about the the issues of climate change, she was allowed to improvise. The video has been edited for brevity and continuity.

Reducing emissions through responsible forest management came out with a major win at the Paris summit in which I like to imagine Koko and a blue bear had a few cheers over.  As The Conversation US reported, “ the climate change agreement adopted by 195 countries in Paris raised the profile of forests in ways never seen before.”

Some highlights include heavily biodiverse nations such as Madagascar agreeing to restore 100 million hectares of forest by 2030. In addition, developed nations were encouraged to support REDD (Reducing Emissions from Deforestation and Forest Degradation in Developing Countries) tactics by compensating developing nations for forest protection. Overall, the tie between greenhouse gas emissions and deforestation was finally made strong at the Paris climate summit, and it seems countries are finally doing something about it.

Above all, Koko understands the severity of climate change better than every presidential candidate from the Republican party. Name calling these conservative candidates monkeys, chimps or apes due to their buffoonery is apparently a disservice to our fellow primates. Donald Trump can’t even tell the difference between weather and climate while Ted Cruz stated that climate change is more of a religion than a science.

Prior to the the summit, GOP politicians tried to discourage international cooperation in Paris by arguing that the U.S. won’t keep up its end of the bargain if a Republican wins the 2016 presidential election.  A simple fix for this I suppose would be to elect a gorilla over any Republican party candidate. What a year the 2016 political campaign season will be when a talking gorilla can outwit half of the electoral choice.